I doubt it is wise for me to write in much detail about this seeing that my blog is open for the world to read. But I don't use my full name anywhere so I will at least write something vague about it. I am simultaneously over-the-moon excited about this and fearful of the negative impact my obesity might have on the opportunity that has presented itself. I couldn't not blog about it.
There is a job. On paper it is THE job for me. It is in the industry I love. It is in the city that I love. It is a promotion for me. It has a career path for future growth. I have every single qualification they are looking for. Every single one. It seems like everything I have wished for in my current job but have not be able to get.
So I am meeting the recruiter who is handling this position next week. I have spoken to her on the phone and she is very excited about my experience and how it will fit in with what the hiring company is looking for.
That's all the good stuff. But niggling in the back of my mind is how my obesity might play into this. First of all, I really don't have a professional wardrobe. I literally have nothing to wear to that is even remotely appropriate for a professional job interview. Second of all, let's face facts and just admit people judge books by their covers. And my cover shows a very fat woman. And my experience is that people don't like fat women very much. Is it even possible for me to overcome my appearance with my qualifications and my personality?
Whatever the answer to that question is, I am still going to go through with meeting the recruiter and (hopefully) an interview with the company. I just can't let this opportunity go by without even trying. I won't say "No" to myself even though I am deathly afraid they will say "No" to me. But I am going to be very self-conscious.
And I need to figure out where I can find something professional-looking in my size. Any suggestions?
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11 comments:
Sounds exciting! I SO hope you get the job!
Do you have a Lane Bryant or a Cato's that you can shop at? What about Fashion Bug? You may be able to find a nice outfit at one of those shops. And Payless usually has nice shoes in wide widths.
Do your makeup, nails, hair... practice good posture, smile... and just be yourself... the same wonderful woman who spoke to the recruiter on the phone.
Good luck! :)
Good luck with the interview. I have my fingers crossed for you. Stay positive.
You can absolutely get the job regardless of your weight. Do what anyone else would do, dress as professionally as you can, and be yourself during the meeting!
Just be confident. You already know you have the qualifications. Don't let your weight get in the way of getting to where you want to be in life.
As far as wardrobe goes, can't really help you there for obvious reasons :).
Good luck.
I absolutely know how you feel...but I hope some of what I'll type here will help ease your fears. If you have the qualifications, you will do just fine. At 300 pounds, I was able to get a job at a large, well respected law firm - lots of interviews, but they looked at my experience, I guess, and not at my size. At about the same (a few years later), I was able to get a job at a big-five accounting firm. When that department folded, I went to work for another lawyer who basically had a solo practice. At this point I was probably closer to 375. (He turned out to be an a**, but it wasn't anything to do with my weight.) I also interviewed with a major bank trust department and was told I didn't get the position only because they found someone internally to promote, which was their preferred practice (and I believe my source on that one). Finally, at around 400 pounds, I interviewed with and was hired by another law firm. So...have confidence - you have a gorgeous photo on your blog, so I think you will make a great impression!
As for clothing...the only thingw I was able to find were at Catherine's Plus Sizes. They have several locations where I am, and some have more business clothes than others.
If you are in the Dallas area, email me and I may even have some hardly-worn stuff that you could consider...just a thought if you are interested!
Good luck - you will do just fine. What an exciting opportunity!
I came across this post on a fashion blog and I thought of your professional clothing problem. Check it out. The site has been really helpful to me.
http://www.omiru.com/index.php/2009/04/09/qa-how-to-build-a-plus-size-professional-wardrobe-on-a-budget/
Confidence will help more than anything (in my humble opinion).
Cato usually has fairly inexpensive dressy/business clothing. I get tons of stuff there and they usually have some good clearance, too. Be really comfortable with your hair and accessories. When you know you look nice, it's a great ego boost and you're automatically more self-confident. You are beautiful and you are intelligent and competent--let it shine through. Try not to allow any thoughts about your size until AFTER the interview. Just don't go there. I have confidence in you! I hope this job is everything you want and that you are everything THEY want! Good luck!
Bethany
I believe that you live near the metroplex. I live in South Arlington and right by my house there is a Plus-Size Resale shop. They even have a suit section. The stuff is pretty nice and affordable. There maybe more of these shops around. I got some pants there that I love (and for $13).
Deb, I am so excited for you! The job sounds like such a great fit, even down to the location.
I definitely understand to your concerns regarding prejudgements based on size . . . as you know, I often worry about the same things when I think about going back to work. I know from your blog picture that you present a very attractive and professional appearance . . . and in addition to your qualifications, the courses you're taking show your motivation to continue to grow professionally. The new firm is lucky to have the chance to hire you!
I know shopping for professional clothes is a total drag, but I think it's worth putting in whatever effort it takes to find something you feel is appropriate and flattering, if for no other reason than that it'll make YOU feel great and confident. If you have a Saks near you, their Salon Z has a reasonable selection of good-quality merchandise. If you don't find anything that fits quite right, I'd recommend visiting a dressmaker/tailor and having them alter something for you . . . or if necessary, have them make something from scratch. I once had to do this for a wedding (a combination of denial on my part and erratic sizing resulted in my ordering a bridesmaid's dress that was several sizes away from fitting) and I was AMAZED at how easy the alterations turned out to be.
GO DEB GO!
Hey Deb, I hope your interview goes really well. I can so relate to your post though. I've had the same fears when job hunting or even doing a presentation in front of the doctors in our group. Will they be assessing my BMI as I stand before them? Do they think my presentation is even credible? I mean, how would I have time to research the material if I'm obviously EATING all of the time. It sucks really. Focus on your qualifications and your experience and do your best. Come from a PLACE OF STRENGTH and you'll win them over for sure. Best of luck!
Girl, you've got this! Don't even fret! And try Lane Bryant for professional...if that's not really in your budget: Cato's is fab and CHEAP!! Also, there's a place where I live called "It's Fashion" and they are wonderful!! Good luck, girl!!
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