Long Overdue Update

I haven't been feeling like blogging lately but that doesn't mean I've given up my weightloss efforts.  So I wanted to post a long overdue update. 


WEIGH IN

Since my last post in early January, I am down 10.7 pounds and down 112 total.  Incredible!  After I met my 100 pounds lost goal, I will admit I did ease up on the eating right and exercise and my loss stalled out for about 6 weeks.  But I got back on the wagon and in my past 5 weeks or so have dropped the 10.7.  This just goes to show that what they tell us is true....weightloss surgery is only a tool.  It does not solve every problem or relieve you of the responsibility to make the right choices.  Because the fact is as time goes by you will be able to eat more.  And when you eat junky stuff like chips, cookies, ice cream, you can eat alot more of that kind of stuff than you can lean protein and vegetables.  No, I can't pack those things away in the quantities I used to but clearly I can eat enough of them to keep me from losing.  And I feel fairly certain if I tried, I could gain weight even though I have a small stomach now.  I am doing most of the work at this point, with some support from my surgery.  I'm the one making the right choices (or not) and exercising my body (or not).  The surgery definitely helps with portion control and cravings, but I'm still the one doing the work.  I'm about 9 months out from surgery now and still no regrets.  I would do it again in a heart beat.


MEASUREMENTS
Since I last posted measurements in December, here are the results:


neck - -0.25/-3.0 total
bust - -3.5/-13.0 total
waist - +0.5/-12.5 total  (WTF???)

hips - -1.75/-9.25

I have a lot more measurement points than this, but I don't want to bore you with them.  In total, I am down 63 inches.  I have to admit I am very frustrated with my waist measurement.  I mean, really, UP half an inch over the course of 2 months?   I always get annoyed when I hear people asking how to spot reduce fat.  I'm like "Come on!  Every knows you can't spot reduce."  But now I am feeling desperate about my fat belly and find myself thinking "what can I do to shift this belly fat?"  I know, I know, you can't spot reduce.  It's just the frustration talking.  I must be patient and trust the process.  Changes are happening.

FITNESS

I'm still working out 3 times a week with my trainers at Fitness Together and am getting alot stronger.  One of my current fitness goals is to leg press 410 pounds because I want to be able press more than my trainer...who is a guy.  What can I say?  I'm feeling competitive.  My goal is to get there before Memorial Day.  I am currently able to press 300 so I think I can do it!

For the past 5 weeks I've also been doing the Couch to 5K training program 3 days a week on my day off of FT.  I can't believe I am RUNNING!  I've never been a runner.  Ever.  I mean, seriously.  EVER!  But running I am.  In fact, I did a 10K yesterday.  I didn't run the whole thing, I did walking/running intervals.  But I did start the race by running 21 minutes straight with no walking.  That is the longest period of running I have done.  After that I completed the race doing walking and running intervals the rest of the way and finished with a time of 1:25:33.  My goal was to finish under 1:30 so mission accomplished.  And I got a snazzy medal to show off for my efforts!

By evening, I was whooped!  My hamstrings and butt were so sore so I soaked in a hot tub and ended up snoozing hard by 9:00 that night.  I slept for 11 hours!  So, yeah, the 10K whooped my butt.  But I whooped it's butt too, so I guess we are even. 

All in all I am still doing well.  Feeling really happy with my progress!

Bold in the Cold

I haven't posted my 2012 goals yet, but one of them is to participate in at least one 5K per month for the entire year.  Today I knocked out my January 5K, Bold in the Cold sponsored by a local running club.  It took us on some of the trails around Lake Grapevine.

I didn't take any pictures (bad blogger).  But they were nice trails and pretty convenient to my house so I will likely visit them again in the future.

I finished the race in just under 45 minutes, mostly walking with some burts of running...well, jogging.  And I made sure I crossed the finish line at a jog.  I was pretty proud of myself, I must say.  I did a 5K in December and was able to improve my time by 1:15.  After the race, I met with my trainer and worked out for 45 minutes.  My, how things have changed for me.

I started the race with the intentions of walking the entire thing.  I have been doing some running intervals on my treadmill at home but didn't really feel ready to try running out in the real world and in front of people!  What I usually do during races, is pick someone out in the pack and make it my goal to get in front of them.  I had Blue Jacket Girl in my sights and I just could NOT catch up with her.  And it started to piss me off.  So I said "to hell with it", and jogged for a couple of minutes.  I can do about 10 minutes of jogging on the treadmill, but no way was I able to do that outside.  (I'm not sure why this is....maybe I'm not pacing myself right without the treadmill to do it for me?)  But once I ran for my first spurt I decided I would finish the race in walking/running intervals.  I definitely did much more walking than running, but still am proud of myself for just doing it rather than holding myself back because I don't think I "look" like a runner.

The last mile I walked nearly the entire thing but I promised myself that when I hit mile marker 3 I was going to run that last 0.2 because I wanted to cross the line running.  And I did!  It was great.  And the other "real" runners are so supportive.  Was really nice to have the high fives and the cheering at the end, even though it was no one I knew. 

I already am signed up for my February race.  And just as I was thinking today how nice it would have been to have a friend with me today, one of my friends hit me up on Facebook when I posted about my plans to do the February race to see if I wanted to make plans to do it together with her.  Right on!  I am excited for that.

As for Blue Jacket Girl, I overtook her once or twice early on, but ultimately she finished well ahead of me.  That's OK.  I'll get her next time!

Racing (?), Limping, Resting, and Napping For The Cure

Holy crap people, I walked a 5K today. No way I thought I could do it. I hadn't trained for it. My walks consist of 10 minutes around the block with Buster. Oh, and I weigh almost 350 pounds. But I walked a 5K today, dammit.

I probably would not have subjected myself to this today (it was really freakin' hard!) except that it was the Race for The Cure and we did it to support one of my good friends who has just finished treatment and surgery for breast cancer. She's only 35!


So how did it go down? Well, first of all I almost talked myself out of doing it more than once, including this morning when my alarm went off. But the thought of letting my friend down and the idea that she had been through months of treatment and surgery and was still going to do the walk finally made me lug my butt out of bed and get ready.

The walk started out very slow as there were 16,000 people there all bunched up at the starting line. It was sunny and a nice cool breeze was blowing. Very nice. I made it through the first mile doing pretty well. We weren't walking real fast but it was a workout to me while the others were just on a leisurely stroll. I was breathing hard and my back was starting to hurt. I just tried to focus on the breeze and the blue skies and not my physical discomfort.

About 1.5 miles in we hit the hills. Oh shit. At first the hills were OK because for some reason it made my back feel better to walk uphill. But I was really getting winded. I finally had to stop and sit down for a few minutes to catch my breath. The others hadn't noticed that I stopped and went on. That was OK. Once I got started again I was able to walk at my own pace rather than trying to keep up with them. That helped.

Every so often in that second half of the race where I was walking alone, I had to stop and sit. I was determined to finish but doubt was starting to creep in. I wasn't paying alot of attention to anyone else but I do have to say a couple of people were quite kind to this fat lady huffing and puffing and sweating. One asked if I was OK when I stopped to sit awhile. Another offered me a bottle of water as we went up another torturous hill. One one hand, it was embarrassing to realize people were noticing my struggle. On the other, it was good to realize some people still know how to be kind, rather than rude or judgmental.

In the homestretch of the walk, I could see the finish line and knew my friends were there waiting because they had texted me. As I kept trudging along I saw a little old lady who looked to be in her 80's, bent with osteoporosis, pass me up. Damn. That was some harsh reality.

But, I finished. Yes, indeed, I did. It took me one hour and 30 minutes, but I finished. I was proud that I had but also completely spent. I decided not to stick around for the festivities that followed because I was too exhausted to want to be standing around much longer so I said my goodbyes and hobbled several blocks back to my car.

I had intended to hit the late Weight Watchers meeting after the walk, but since it took me so much longer than I had thought it would, I missed it. So I headed home where I cleaned up and promptly fell asleep for several hours. I was exhausted.

Tonight my feet and ankles are very sore and I am limping around. I am proud of my accomplishment today. At the same time, it is a brutal wake up call as to how out of shape I am and how much my weight hinders me.

I don't think I'll be doing another 5K for awhile because it took too much out of me. But it did make me want to step up my exercise just a bit and start getting this weight off and getting some of my fitness back.

First Walk in 2010

On New Year's Day I started the year off right by sticking to my eating plan and getting out with my little dog and taking a walk. Ever since moving to my new place I have been meaning to check out the walking/biking trails that run throughout the city. Am I ever glad I did. In my old neighborhood there was nowhere convenient to walk except around boring old suburban neighborhoods. Ho hum. I was always envious of the pretty walks some of you post pictures of. Well it seems I have found a pretty walk of my own.

The trail is long and winding and I am looking forward as my fitness increases to be able to explore more and more of it.

Weigh in: 3.1 lost, 178.9 to go

Starting 2010 off right with a great loss!!! I actually started on my "2010 Goals" a couple of days after Christmas so I gave myself a head start. I've been tracking my food and staying within my calorie budget and have gotten a nice walk in. Will today too. It's gorgeous out.

I'm back to work on Monday and that will be the real test. Today I need to work on a little bit of meal planning so that I have things to bring to work. I am determined not to let 2010 be like 2009!

Monday Rest and Report #2

I must be really dedicated to this training. I am still in Iowa but I got my training in anyway. I had done my 3 miles at home on Tuesday. Once in Iowa I got a 3 day pass for the local rec center so I could use their treadmills and got the rest of my workouts in on F/Sat/Sun. I am so proud of myself for not letting being away from home deter me!

Week 2 Plan versus Actual was:
T - 3 miles done
Th - 3 miles done on Friday instead
F - 30 minutes cross (Curves) skipped
Sat - 4 miles done, split into two 2 mile walks
Sun - 3 miles done

Many of you assured me I would see improvements quickly. You were right! Week 1 was from hell and left me really questioning my abilities. In Week 2 I already saw improvements. Here's the list if things I noticed:

• Calf pain almost non-existent this week. More of a muscle fatigue than out and out pain.
• By Sunday I was able to do my entire 3 miles at a pace of 2.1mph (had been doing 2.0) A small increase, but the small increases will add up over time AND help shorten the time it takes me to complete my mileage which is a serious motivation for me!
• Spending MUCH less time holding on to handrails.
• Did not want to cry by the end of the week. Actually felt positive about what I am accomplishing.

I am heading home in the morning so I will be back in my normal routine. That is good because my mileage ups even more for Week 3. Also I need to do a better job of getting my cross-training in. I did start doing some core strengthening exercises by just focusing on tightening and releasing my ab muscles whenever I thought about it. Mostly while brushing my teeth in the morning! I also want to try to get some outdoor walking in this week even though it was pretty disastrous in Week 1. I can't do all my training on the treadmill and expect to be able to walk 60 miles outside. It's just not the same.

Week 3 training looks like this:
T - 3 miles
Th - 4 miles
Fri - cross train (30 min at Curves plannned)
Sat - 5 miles (will try to do at least 0.5 miles outside, preferably a full mile)
Sun - 3 miles

I'm feeling good and actually looking forward to seeing how my 5 mile day goes. What a difference a week makes!

Monday Rest and Report #1

Yesterday I finished my first of 24 weeks of training in preparation for the Breast Cancer 3-Day. Yes, I will be walking 60 miles over the course of three days in November.

The training program I am following is provided by the 3 Day organization and consists of 4 days of walking per week (with increasing mileage each week), 2 days of some form of cross-training, and 1 rest day which I am taking on Mondays since my "long mileage" days will be on Saturdays and Sundays.

Week One Training Plan was:
four 3 mile walks (T/Th/Sat/Sun)
one 30 minute cross-training session on Friday


Week One Training Actual was:
four 3 miles walks (T/F/Sat/Sun)
no cross-training


Details:
Most of my walking was done on my new treadmill. Getting 3 miles in is VERY difficult for me as I continue to struggle with lower back pain and calf pain. It's all a function on my weight. Cardiovascularly I feel completely fine and even feel I could up my pace if only my back and calves would cooperate. I was averaging a 2mph pace and a heart rate in the high 120's to low 130's. I spent lots of time leaning on the handrails in order to take pressure off my back. I am working on making a concerted effort to increase my non-leaning time because I doubt there will be 60 miles of handrails on this walk!

I cannot emphasize enough how completely unpleasant this exercise is for me right now. It is an act of sheer will that I able to do it. Tuesday was my best day because I was so happy I actually did a full 3 miles. Sunday was my worst day. I was unable to get my Thursday walk in and so had to do it on Friday instead. That put me at three 3 mile walks in a row. By Sunday my body was in full mutiny.

I woke up with pain in my calves but was determined to get my 3 miles in no matter what. I had been feeling bad for Buster not getting his walks as I did mine on the treadmill so I decided to do my first mile outdoors with him. I barely made it half a mile outside and that included lots of stops to lean on a fence or mailbox to relieve pressure from my back. It was really REALLY bad. I almost sat down on a curb and gave up. I wanted to cry. But I made it back home and could not imagine how I was going to finish the 2.5 miles I had left. So I decided to do it in 15 minute increments instead of all at once. I spent the rest of the day working on schoolwork for a while, hopping on the treadmill for 15 minutes, fold some laundry, 15 on the treadmill, and on and on until I had finished a full 3 miles. It was an absolute horrific day and I was completely beat by the end of it.

I took a hot bath to try to sooth my aching body (and my beaten spirit). I have never been more aware of the gravitational pull of the earth than I was Sunday evening. With every movement I could feel all those extra pounds weighing me down, pushing me into the earth, crushing me, making everything I do so much harder than it should be. It made me really sad. And scared.

Week One whipped me physically and emotionally and left me really questioning if I am going to be able to do this training, let alone do the actual walk. The mileage starts upping very quickly and I am scared my body won't adapt quickly enough to be able to handle it. But I am trying to just focus on one week, even one walk at a time and see what happens.

I don't mean for this Rest and Report to be a downer. I just want it to be honest. I am hopeful I can look back on it in Week 24 and really see just how far I have come.


Coming Up for Week Two:
T - 3 miles
Th - 3 miles
F - 30 minutes cross (Curves)
Sat - 4 miles (may have to split this into two 2 mile walks...we'll see)
Sun - 3 miles
I'd also like to start incorporating some lower back strengthening exercise on my cross-training days since that pain is really holding me back. I know Supermans are good for the lower back. I am open for suggestions of other exercises I can do at home to strengthen my back.

Exercise Log #12

5/24/09 12:30PM

Goal: 1 hour walk on treadmill

Achieved: 1 hour

Distance: 2.04 miles

Average Pace: 2.04mph

Avg heart rate: 126

Physical: During the first 30 minutes my pace ranged from 2.2 to 2.6 but that was causing the lactic acid again. Remembering that distance is more important that speed, I slowed it down to 1.8 to 2.2 in the 2nd 30 minutes. Next time I am going to start at the slower pace to give myself more time to warm up. Getting off the treadmill I am like an 80 year old woman.

Emotional: Still feeling scared I won't be able to achieve my goal of walking in the Breast Cancer 3 Day walk. But am trying to push that to the back of my mind and just do what I need to do each day. I know this will start getting easier, especially as my weight starts dropping.

Exercise Log #11

5/23/09 2:00PM


Goal: 1 hour walk on treadmill


Achieved: 30 minutes


Distance: 1.2 miles


Average Pace: 2.4mph


Avg heart rate: 134


Physical: My pace ranged from 2.1 to 3.0. I actually maintained 3.0 mph for 3 minutes. I started out at a higher pace this time (2.4 as compared to 2.1 last time). That ended up being a mistake. Lactic acid in my calves forced me to have to stop at 30 minutes. I barely was able to make it to that point. I hobbled off the treadmill like an old lady and sat down to stretch my calves to try to release the lactic acid.


Emotional: Started out a little cocky, I guess, thinking this walking thing would be easy since I was able to do the full hour last time. Now I am feeling a bit discouraged. I just need to remember to walk at a pace I can maintain for an hour, even if it does seem excruciatingly slow. It is more important for my 3 Day training that I am able to get the miles in, not how fast I do them. I guess I was just looking ahead to Tuesday when my official 24-week training program begins. Week 1 is just four 3 mile walks so I have been wanting to be able to walk at a 3mph pace so I could complete those walks in an hour. That's why I should have been more consistent with my walking sooner. But, what is done is done, and I am where I am. For now my pace is less than 3 mph. I have to start where I am and trust that with consistency I will get where I want to be.

Exercise Log #9

5/19/09 8:00PM

Goal: 1 hour walk on treadmill

Achieved: 1 hour (that's right...I said 1 hour....woohoo)

Distance: 2.28 miles

Pace: 2.28mph

Avg heart rate: 136

Physical: My pace ranged from 2.1 to 3.0. I actually maintained 3.0 mph for 5 minutes. Sweating and breathing hard (good). Still struggling with my back (bad). Spent lots of time leaning on the handrails. Jillian Michaels would SO have been screaming at me.

Emotional: I had forgotten how much I actually love to do a good cardio workout. As I sweated and breathed I remembered the days when I was in shape and would do my daily 45 min - 1 hour on the elliptical. It felt good - then and now. The endorphins rush and when I am doing cardio on machine I love to challenge myself in different ways. I am looking forward to doing that with my treadmill. (For example, next time I want to make it to 6 minutes at 3.0 mph.) I realized that my own weight is holding me back from achieving the true euphoria I used to feel. But the positive of that is I can remember the euphoria again and am motivated to get some pounds off so I can experience it pain-free again.

Exercise Log #3

3/31/09 12:40PM
Goal: 1 hour walk
Achieved: 39 minutes (9 more than last time)
Distance: 1.4 miles
Pace: 2.2mph
Avg heart rate: 131

Physical: I wouldn’t say my back hurt today. I’d just say that my back was tired. About halfway through the walk it was the same muscle sensation you get when you are carrying something really heavy and are ready to either put it down or drop it. I guess that is in essence what I am putting my back through. My calves were fatigued. Ignoring those discomforts it felt good be breathing and sweating.

Emotional: Happy. It was an absolutely gorgeous day to be out walking: sunny, cloudless, and 60 degrees with a nice breeze. Determined. To make it just a bit farther than I did the last time. Optimistic. That one day soon I will be taking these walks and not thinking about my back or my calves and only thinking about the gorgeous weather and the good feeling of exercising my body.

Exercise Log #1

Hiatus schmiatus. I lasted a week away from blogging. What brings me back today is a new feature I will be adding to my blog - and exercise log that will document my feelings, both physical and emotional, as I attempt to add regular exercise and (hopefully) increase my fitness. The particular perspective I want to bring out is what it is like when you are starting out very heavy and exercise is truly difficult, if not painful, for you.

I have not been very consistent with my exercise because it is just plain HARD at this weight. I feel physical pain when doing it and it wears me out something fierce. Of course it does. Everything I do I am doing with another person...a large one at that....strapped to my back. Knowing this, it can be difficult to convince myself to get up and do it. But I have to if I am going to get stronger, improve my fitness, and walk 60 MILES in November!

I used to be very fit and it is discouraging to me to see how far I have backslid in my fitness as my weight has gone up. I want my fitness back. And I want to document the process for myself and for others who might be in the same position I am. I am hoping by doing this log it will help me to see ways in which I am improving.

And so I bring you my very cleverly titled "Exercise Log #1"

Time: 1:30PM
Goal: walk for 1 hour
Achieved: walk for 30 minutes
Pace: Dunno…pedometer battery is dead
Avg heart rate: 128
Physical: At just the 4 minute point my lower back was protesting. I did the best I could to keep going, but had to stop frequently to lean on a fence or a mailbox to take the pressure off my back. My hip joints and upper quads were feeling really taxed. I had to cut my walk short at 30 minutes not because I was out of breath but because my back just could not take it anymore.
Emotional: Scared. I am young but my body feels so broken down and incapable. Walking is hard for me. How many more pounds before I would be immobilized? Embarrassed. There were lots of people out and about on my walk today and for the first time I can remember I was embarrassed to be seen out exercising, walking my super slow pace while panting, sweating, and limping. I hate to think how I looked to these people. Disappointed. I was unable to complete my goal and, more importantly, I was unable to enjoy my walk and the gorgeous weather we had today because I was in pain.