I am supposed to be in class tonight. First class of the new semester. I skipped it. And tomorrow I'm going to drop it. Even though I had 3 weeks off from school I just am not ready to face going back. I was only going to take one class this semester to give myself a break. But now I am taking none.
I just cannot do it.
Hopefully I feel better about it in the spring. But right now, the idea of resuming classwork in addition to my job....well, just thinking about it induces a panicky feeling in me.
I've been feeling on the edge these past few weeks and months. There have been days I have literally felt like I could have a nervous breakdown. I guess I don't really know what a nervous breakdown entails. I just know that there have been many, many days that I have felt that all it would take is one wrong word, a wrong step, a dropped pencil, or the wind blowing the wrong direction and I would crumble to pieces. And I am not a delicate person. I can and have handled alot in my life. But I am tired. And I can't do it any more. I must rest.
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Dumping Amazon and living a more deliberate life
10 months ago
14 comments:
You've got to do what's best for you!
Deb, for whatever it may be worth, I think giving yourself the semester off from school to recharge your emotional batteries and get started on a plan to feel better physically was a great decision!
Deb, I'm GLAD for you. You are thinking of yourself and I think you made the right choice. Your emotional state is too fragile to mess around with. Get some rest and start again when your mind is more at ease. *Hugs*
Bethany
I support that choice. You have to look after yourself first and foremost. Good luck!
You know what's best for you. Hope you feel better.
I was reading your post about the airport and the sweating. Oh Sister! I can feel your pain there. I thought I was the only person on earth that sweat like that. I find it terribly embrassing. It really disrupts my life.
Nice to know I am not alone!
I am glad for the relief you must now feel that you have one excess commitment off your back.
Take care of you.
for me that is *frequently* acknowledging that one more thing will sendeth me careening over the proverbial edge.
and I remind myself that NO is NOT a 4 letter word :)
and I use it.
Miz.
You're smart to know when to say "enough" and that's really important. School will always be there. Take the time to get rested and centered again instead of driving yourself into a ditch. Sending positive thoughts your way.
You have been pushing yourself so hard with school and work - I'm glad you are giving yourself a break! I'll bet you start feeling so much better about life in general quickly now that the pressure is off with the class. Hang in there, Deb - good things are coming your way!
I am glad that you made the decision to take care of yourself. I hope you benefit from this period of rest and emerge on the other side feeling rested and ready to conquer the world!
You deserve it Deb.
Well, like everyone else I think you made the right decision. You need to take care of yourself. I've been there, too - too much on my plate, over stressed, tired, and just not happy.
I've been reading your previous posts, and I wish I could give you a big hug right now. I know you are upset, and tired and frustrated. You are worth taking care of! Take the time to think about WHY you want to lose weight, and write it all down. Then read it - a lot - until you get that feeling that you're ready to try. Then take it one meal at a time. Don't beat yourself up if you slip up, just get right back on the horse with the next meal. Reach out to people for support! You can do it!
Good for you for recognizing The Wall when you saw it and electing to regroup. Use the time for YOU.
Good for you!! :)
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