I am a CPA working in the financial reporting department of a publicly traded comany. I am pursuing my MBA degree part time at night in hopes of achieving a higher position someday. And I fear my appearance will sabotage my hard work, if it hasn't already. I am not necessarily complaining about this or calling it unfair. The fact is we all make judgments about people based on their appearances.
We'd like to think we don't, but we do. If I wanted to hire a professional person, say someone to manage my investment portfolio, who would impress me more? The professionally dressed and put together person? Or the one in old worn out clothes and flip flops? The choice would be easy.
Our appearance and how we maintain it says alot about us whether we want it to or not. And while we cannot all be great beauties and runway models or have unlimited shopping budgets, we can make our best efforts with what we've got. For me, weight loss will take time so there is nothing about that aspect of my appearance I can change immediately. But I can do my best with where I am now rather than doing what I am currently doing. And that is avoiding clothes shopping at all costs while sticking with the few pieces I have that fit and wearing them until they are worn out altogether. By the time I am finished with an item of clothing it is so worn out I won't even donate it to charity. These are not the sorts of clothes a professional person should be wearing to work.
So I put myself out there and made an effort to shop. And let's face it, shopping is not fun when you are 5'11" and 325 pounds. Clothes were not made to fit me. But that just means I have to work harder and try on more things to find what works. And work I did. I spent 4 hours on my feet, traipsing from one plus-sized department to another, from one fat girl store to another. I lugged alot of clothes around hell-bent on trying new things and buying only what fit and what I really liked. No more buying things that are too tight hoping to fit in them one day. All that does is discourage me. I open a closet full of clothes but only have a few things I can wear. From now on I will only buy what fits and I will begin moving all the too small things into another closet so I don't have to look at them each morning. I want to open my closet and know what is in there I can wear.
Even though it was hard work and I often got discouraged yesterday, I did find a few things I can add to my work wardrobe. So many things are unflattering at this weight, even things that are made in my size. My body feels misshapen to me when I put things on and they look horrible. But I won't give up. I will just keep putting myself out there. I have to admit that I did learn that some of the department stores are starting to carry a bit more selection in the plus-sized departments. Usually I feel like I have to stick with Lane Bryant and The Avenue. But I found that Macy's had a few nice things, including Calvin Klein jeans in plus-sizes although they were too short for me. But still, it was good to realize that maybe there are a few more places I can shop.
I think I will give this shopping thing a try again in a few weeks. I really do want to do a better job of projecting a professional image no matter what my weight.
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4 comments:
Oh, I feel your pain. Shopping was so hard when I was in plus sizes. It feels like no matter how much I spent, no matter what I picked, it just didn't look "right". Do what you can, and be sure to wear clothes that are comfortable so that you come off as relaxed and confident. That matters a lot too!! Keep up with your goals and one day this will not be a problem :)
I totally share your feelings on this! When it's hard to find anything that even fits let alone is flattering, it is so tempting to just put off shopping!
I worked as a corporate lawyer on Wall St from 1990 to 1996. Although I gained most of my weight after I stopped practicing law, I was up to 220 when I left the corporate world, and I remember very well just how difficult it was to find things that fit and looked professional. For the past 10 years, I've worn mostly casual clothes, but even given the more forgiving fit it's really hard to find anything remotely flattering and like you, I've let my wardrobe suffer as a result.
It's a great idea to relegate the "don't fits" to a different closet. You've inspired me to clean out my own closet and get myself down to the store to buy a few new things for fall that'll make me feel good now. Thanks for the inspiration!
Re department stores, you might want to check out Saks (I think they have online shopping if there isn't a store near you). It is my absolute favorite plus-size section!
Deb good for you! I too feel your pain. I was just saying to my trainer today that I need to buy clothes that fit me. I always, always, buy my shirts too big. It makes me feel hidden and protected. I also wear my clothes until they are thread bare! I'm a stay at home mom, but that's no reason to slack off an look like a slob! :)
Great post!
Ria, thanks for the tip. I know there is an "Off Saks" sort of outlet store thing around here. I will have to check to see if we have Saks. If not, I will definitely check it out online. I am very serious about trying harder to get out there and improve my wardrobe!
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